I’m what’s commonly known as a chronic people pleaser, which means that people can do no wrong. Myself on the other hand, I’m a pothole-filled road in need of repair.
Of course, that doesn’t mean I make mistakes all the time. It just means that I see room for criticism within myself more often than I do the world around me.
It’s not self-deprecation, but perfectionism. I know I can be better, and often times I am. But in instances where I operate at a lower standard than I expect of myself, I find my complacency reaches an all-time high.
If I miss a deadline I’ve set for myself, I find it hard to proceed. Should I skip this deadline, or take time out of my next one to complete it. Where does that put me in terms of productivity for the week?
The chaos that reigns when I behave less idyllically than I would like is crippling. I’ve got a rigid plan in my head and deviating from said plan means that I could glitch like a Windows 98 OS.
Glitching symptoms include freezing up, wandering aimlessly and incomplete trains of thought. The remedy? Sounding out my thoughts.
Thinking out loud, recognizing my problems and fixing them is my way of refocusing my mind. Self-criticism is my way of processing mistakes and realigning my priorities.
Self-complacency is the only way I know how to pull myself out of potholes I’ve created for myself. I complain because I believe in myself, and I think that validates my complaints.
I’m sure you might have this same quirk. You might even come down harder on yourself when things don’t go your way. I think you and I both are doing fine, though, considering how much less productive we could be.
I like to remind myself at the end of the day that no matter what I complain about, what obstacles I’ve run into today, that I can pick up and start over tomorrow.
If I can’t start over, then that’s another lesson learned. The best thing about being in my 20s era is that this is the time for mistakes. The best thing about being past your 20s is that you realize mistakes aren’t confined to your 20s, and that you can learn any lesson at any time.
I’m 25 and I’ve recently learned that I put either 0% or 100% of my efforts into the things I care about – I know no midpoint. I’d love to expand in another post, but for now, feel free to read my other In My 20s Era posts similar to this one.
Now that I’ve answered this question, I’d love to know what lessons you’ve learned about yourself recently. Let me know how old you are as well – Let’s get to know each other!
Thanks for reading 🙂
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