CW Room

Describe a phase in life that was difficult to say goodbye to.

Emotions about the past

I suppose I’d like to say the hardest phase in life to give up were school, university or academic years that are designed to be clear cut and scheduled so that you’re hardly ever lost.

I suppose I’d like to say the hardest part of my life to give up was something that brought me joy like living alone, leaving what I consider to be my home country, or growing up from a child to an adult in my 20s. I suppose I’d like to say it was difficult to give up my childish ignorance and become a responsible member of society.

Truthfully, I think phases of life are designed to pass by. I think in hindsight, you may recognise the transition was difficult, but never more than you could have handled.

Heartbreak, loss, even pain passes subtly to become a memory in the distant past. A part of your life you succeeded in overcoming. It becomes a haze of experience that replays in your head like a movie that you will never again be the main character in because that time has passed.

I suppose what I wish I didn’t have to say is that the hardest phase in life to say goodbye to is now. By now I mean the constantly updating phases of life that you find yourself in at the perpetual present.

Anything you go through will constantly be the most difficult, best or most intense moment of your life, and if you’re still stuck on something in your past, then you aren’t over it. There is still work to be done.

The ‘Learning in my 20s’ Phase

My past has taught me lessons that I carry with me to this day, but it could never be enough. Today, and everyday is the most difficult phase for me to put behind me. As an adult in my 20s era, I am learning new things everyday, trying to stay on top of a life that seems to be racing me to the finish line.

Mental health in your 20s hinges on your ability to keep up with this race, and keeping up requires getting a head start. You need the tools and resources that keep you afloat in your 20s to make sense of them, and you don’t get these tools by default.

Financial literacy in your 20s, making new friends, even relationships all find new ways to challenge you in your 20s and it seems that keeping up is a daily trail. Fortunately, every challenge you face in your 20s era will correspond to available resources that you will have to learn.

Finding Yourself In Your 20s

Every challenge in your 20s requires an easy, controllable solution except one – The challenge of ‘finding yourself’. I’ve used quotes because the concept of finding yourself is an abstract, puffed up concept that you always hear about, but is a mountain of puzzles in itself.

I struggled to find a solution to this puzzle until I realized I was asking the wrong question. You don’t ‘find yourself’. You decide who you want to be, and find ways to better yourself until you are on your way to being the version of yourself you are content with.

In my early 20s, I swam through a sea of corporate jobs and unpaid internships in a field that I wasn’t interested in and where I felt I was not producing the value I wanted for my life and the world. Then, I decided to be a writer.

This part – Finding yourself in your 20s – is the world’s most convoluted phase, or so I think as a person in my mid-20s. You are lost until you come to this conclusion, and no one seems to have the answer for you until you create it yourself.

There it is – the answer to finding yourself in your 20s. Find out what you want your identity to be and work towards it. In fact, you could make an entire career out of this most of the time. I wrote a blog about this here: Want to be Successful?

The 20s Era is Difficult

Obviously, here I am, a privileged average girl in my mid-20s, proclaiming that being in your 20s is the hardest time of your life and you’re thinking – well obviously you’ve never “insert traumatic experience here.”

Friends – I don’t mean to say your 20s era is your most difficult, but if you are in your 20s, everyday is a new phase cycle that you have to experience, learn from and let go. The second-guessing that culminates into developing a happy, successful version of yourself in your 20s era is akin to fighting a civil war within your mind on the daily.

Some of us, myself included, continue to pursue dreams that people only get to see the results of. The journey to those dreams may be a new experience that most of us are having to make up as we go, and the difficulties endured are ones that will have been uncommon enough to warrant some serious self-doubt.

I still don’t know if my path to becoming a writer is the correct one. I can only measure my success based on my own satisfaction and benchmarks that I’ve placed. There is no one around to tell me what I’m doing right or wrong.

Some of us are burdened with this and additional doubt from others that affects us. In fact, some of us have no idea what we want to be yet. Being in your 20s is the adult version of a new born, and that is a tough experience whichever way you slice it.

Mental health in your 20s is hard to maintain for this exact reason. Luckily, support systems are one of those resources that are more commonly available than others. You must reach out, because this will not be your down fall.

Saying Goodbye to your 20s

Just as each phase of life naturally passes, so too will this phase. Eventually, you will know who you are and you will be quite proud of your achievements. Right until then, and only when you reach your goals, will you be able to bid this phase of your life farewell.

Until you do, your 20s era runs on a difficult learning curve that repeats on the daily, and you will be hard-pressed to bid this era goodbye until you are ready. Luckily, your 20s era is also one of the best, most exciting times of your life.

You have all the options ready and available for you, and the only thing to stand in your way is yourself. Time won’t stop for you, and this phase of your life is aching to end. All you really have to do is face the challenge head on. Luckily, we’re all built for this challenge, so you got this!

Thanks for reading! Check out more blogs I write about my 20s era. I also publish often on my book blog and write fictional short stories. Occasionally, I’ll post a travel blog or a food blog, so do check those out as well!